I feel like, somewhere along the way, people started seeing me as the mother who had it all together. I have been pulled aside, messaged, and flat out called out in front of a crowd for this blatant lie.
I, in fact, have nothing together more than anyone else. Actually, I gave up having it all together after Veda was born. That baby #5 really rocked me. But, that’s when (more than ever before) people would confront me wanting to know how I could do it all — It’s as if my letting go and giving in to this stage of life really allowed me to relax and become a confident hot mess.
We are always late (or really early); my kids never have on matching socks – or any socks. I swear the crumbs in the van reappear within 38 seconds of me trying to vacuum the freaking thing out.
All of that to say this: If you do believe that I am doing a good job over here, then know this:
You are allowed to not take your family on a magical trip for Christmas.
You are allowed to buy them everything on their wishlist (and more).
You are allowed to stick to the want, need, wear, and read rule.
You are allowed to jet set across the world for Christmas.
You are allowed to spend Christmas on the beach, in the snow, or sleeping under the stars.
You are allowed to make this YOUR family’s Christmas – not someone else’s.
I have focused a lot on why you should consider experiences over all.the.junk. I have written about our own experiences. It is true, my kids did not miss a damn plastic package while we adventured last year – and it was glorious, BUT – BUT – BUT – this year?
This year, I am buying all.the.gifts.
Why? I’m not exactly sure. We aren’t doing a big trip – possibly postponing my cross-country winter drive until spring, even. It will be our first Christmas morning in this beautiful house, maybe that’s playing into it? Maybe it’s just that my oldest will be TEN next year, and there aren’t many ‘Santa Years’ left? Or, maybe, I’m just in the mood to have a big Christmas!
Buying a bunch of presents doesn’t ruin my kids. It doesn’t make me a bad mom. It doesn’t make our family any more ridiculous than we already were. We just live in a society that judges everything.
Guess what? It doesn’t matter my exact reasons – just like it doesn’t matter what you decide. The kicker, though, is that you just need to be happy with whatever you decide! Go big, go little, go outside, travel, bake, sleep… just make sure that you (and your family) are happy this Christmas!